Backpast notes.....Time for recap

Song of the Day: Complicated by Avril Lavine

I cant even believe its been 3 weeks since my last entry, well yes I can. My life has been going 900 mph and im just now starting to hit the brakes. BUT THERE IS SOOOOO MUCH TO SAY. Guess Imma have to do it in the form of BACKPAST NOTES!!!

• Grandma is out of the hospital and in the nursing home. She is doing fine but she gives my mom hell from time to time. I hope when she goes home my mom can get get some much needed stress relief
• My sister moved her children out of the house. She found a nice condo and bought some furniture for a good price. Im proud of her for being independent!!!
• Work is work! A co-worker, Chasity, and I have become friends. She is sooo cool and we hang out from time to time.

Now for the real juice. I got "involved" with this guy, we will refer to him as Ric. He delivers food for the program I work for. I would speak to him when he came in and I called him once for a business matter, but we were basically strictly on a hi and bye basis. But Monday I had to call him for another business matter, and this Nigga decides to text me back. We texted for about 40 hours straight, when we were awake that is. It was nice. I thought he would be the summer fling I was looking for. Then he tells me he has a girlfriend....WHY LAWD!?!?!? He said we wanted to continue texting me so he did. He started getting raunchy. That should have been my cue to let him know the deal, but me being the hard headed person I am, I just played into it. Well some boundaries got crossed (not going into detail) and he felt some kind of regret. He told me he strictly wanted to be friends. That kinda hurt me, but he still texts me, sometimes more than what I want. I dont think he will keep this up for long. I feel that sooner than later he will be back to his old tricks. He thinks Im cute and he sees me 5 of 7 days in a week so.....(update to follow soon, I hope)

RECAP YALL!!!1

Song of the Day: Celebration by Kool & The Gang

WOW! I have learned so many things this summer. The ladies at my job keep me laughing, but they also teach me life lessons on a daily basis. May I share them with you?

• Be yourself, no matter what people say or do, you can only be YOU!
• A Puerto Rican Suitcase is a grocery bag, this is useful info no matter what.
• Never let a man worry you, especially if he is not your husband. Even if you love him to death, letting him fray your nerves is no good.
• Watch your mouth, you never know who may be listening.
• Be ye also ready.....nuff said.
• Laugh, A LOT

I am happy to report that my sister made it home from Iraq. She is fine and her children were very happy to see her. Im sure she was happy to see them as well. She is reporting to base in the morning but will be back on the weekend.

My fourth of July was ok. I worked most of the day but when i got off, I went to Elle's house for food. My mom, sister, and nieces were there and we had a good time. I went with Elle and her children to see the fireworks sponsored by my small city. They were ok, but we were late getting a good spot to watch them. I was just glad to be out. :)

Family Time

Song of the Day: Grandma's Hands by Bill Withers


Im a little sad, but not much. My grandmother had been complaining of chest and side pains for two or three days straight. My mom finally convinced her to go to the hospital. She is a very independent woman and doesnt like people to take care of her. I was a little upset when I went to see her at her house Thursday morning. She was in a lot of pain and her face told it all. I didnt like it and it felt like that would be the last time i would see her. Im glad my mom got her to go to the hospital. She was admitted on Friday and Tonight I am staying the night with her.

By the grace of God, my aunt, uncle, and cousin and my other grandma were coming down here this weekend anyway. It feels good to have the family together again. The last time they were down here, it was for a happy occasion. This time its a not so happy one. Im just glad all the family is together again and Im thankful we all pull together in a time of need.

It is true that the family is the basic unit. Without it, much will go undone. I believe that if the family structure would return to the state at which it once was, a lot of problems would be resolved and prevented. A family doesnt have to be a mother, father, and 2.5 kids, but any form of a solid, loving unit that will come together when the time is needed. Im thankful to the Lord that I have many units to band together on my behalf.

Rships.....OSN

Song of the Day: Mad by Ne-yo

The word "relationship" has not been defined in its proper terms. Everyone is in a relationship with everyone, but there are different kinds. I have relationships with my parents, my nieces, my co-workers and a select few people I call friends. The most obvious kinds of relationships are those you have with the opposite sex. They are also the most complicated. Why is this?

Im in a relationship that is "quite complex" (shout out to Khalifa). I have known this guy for a year and a half. We met over the internet and developed a relationship. We were deeply in love, but circumstances got in the way of what we wanted to achieve. As of right now we are not boyfriend and girlfriend, but we love one another. I dont want to be committed to anyone now, but he is always there for me, and you cannot deny that its not love.

On the other hand, the "online" thing is getting tiresome. We work different shifts and there is a significant difference in our ages. I want a man who is at a similar place in his life like I am in mine. I want someone physically and mentally attractive, God-fearing, in touch with his emotions and knows how to communicate them effectively. Near the top of that list is someone who will find me, and be interested in me, a man who is waiting for me, and seeking me. He will come, probably when I least expect it.

OSN, I was with my cousin today and we passes by the local corner store. Her mother was standing outside talking to her ex and his brother. She was not at all happy. They had a nasty break up and she wants nothing else to do with him. She told me that he stalks her when she visits her new boo and call her at 2 a.m. when no one is awake. He tryna talk to her on the low but she aint having it. He has a girlfriend but he wants her back. I think it has something to do with the fact that her name is tatted on his chest.

The Roughest Week Ever

Song of the Day: Large Amounts by Ludacris

OSN!!! I had one of the roughest weeks of my life. At my summer job, there was a lot of confusion going on. Mon-Thurs. a group of workforce kids come and help us get things done. YEAH RIGHT! Them niggas dont work for nothing. All they wanna do is come in, sit down, eat for free, and make fun of their supervisor, JO. She really aint no better than them. She doesnt really make them do anything because she just wants a check herself.

The meals we provide must be delivered. Everyday this week, there was a problem with delivery. Some people got their food late, some people didnt come pick it up. Alot of people got meals, but in the wrong quantities. It was a very hectic and busy week. It will all pay off when I get paid on the 26th. I wonder what I will purchase first. Im supposed to by a television, but i really want and iPod touch. I also want shoes, put IDK which to buy first, Nikes, VANS, Sperries, soooo many choices.

Lord please help me to enjoy the week ahead. Give me strength to complete the tasks that are set before me. Allow Your glory to shine through me, so that when people look at me, they will see You. Love me, Lead me and Guide me. Protect my mind and keep in strong. Make me into the person you would have me to be, IJN, Amen.

Im Fine!

Song of the Day: Halle Berry by Superstarr

This week at work, I surprised myself. Much credit to my mother for advising me to be professional. I was the best dressed thing up in there, everyday that week. Even though I am having some weight management issues, my mother and I make sure that my clothes game is on point. I guess that can make up for the 100+ extra pounds I carry on my frame. I recently found out that my ex lost a pile of weight....ugh. IDK why but I feel like I will be running into him at some point this summer, so I must be on my game at all times, even if Im just going to Wal-Mart.

Even though I dont possess the qualities most men would find appealing, I know Im fine and what I may lack in Physical appearance, I more than make up with intelligence, drive, personality, spirituality, sense of humor, and well-rounded ness. I know it, others know it, its just hard sometimes to actually live it out. From this point on, I affirm that Im fine as a B*tch, and err nigga wanna holla. :)

Side note: working 15 days straight aint no joke, but i gotta get some money, cant wait til im able to put music on my iPod touch =)

New Job Yall!!!

Song of the Day: Swag Suffer by FLY

OSN!!! I got the job at a non-profit organization that I have wanted since I volunteered here last summer. My mother also works here. Monday was my first day and it was fun. There is a lady here, we will refer to her as Elle, that is sooo funny. She has seven children and a husband who is kinda retarded. Everything Elle says is funny and she definitely has us cracking up all the time. The kitchen staff are some characters as well. Dee and Angel are two older ladies who have wierd philosophies on life. Dee talks really fast and likes to holler out of car windows when she goes places with my mother.... Angel cant talk at all and everyone picks on her, but she is always nice to me and take up for me. There is another monitor, that what I am, her name is Victoria and I cant stand her. She had a higher position last year but she got demoted because she never turned in her paper work on time. Last year there was another monitor with flaming red hair. She wasnt re-hired because last year, she never did her job and would go to random funerals when she was supposed to be on the clock.

I work with mostly African Americans, except for one man, but he may as well be black because you would never know he was white my hearing his voice. I love my people and my people love me. I like working with black peeps because we know how to have a good time. This group of people knows how to work first and have fun later. There is a tradition that on Fridays, everyone contributes money and we have and extra special lunch. Last year we had meatloaf, chicken, fish, breakfast, roast pork, and all the sides you could think of. I love the people here and my boss so nice. We can call her Angie. She is new to the program like me and in my interview I thought she was a little, "removed" from the culture, but she aint. She fits in with the rest of us and She is nice and understanding. Anytime I have a problem, she is calm and lets me know how to solve it. And the best part about this job, $11 and hour!!!!! :)